Feeling on top of the world
Feeling on top of the world
Ever had that feeling that you are on top of the world and everything in your life is just going great? Many of us are lucky to have those divine moments of total bliss, where we feel like nothing can bring us down. Thump! That was reality kicking in. It is completely unrealistic to think that every moment of our lives can be characterised by that level of high, and the more we try and chase that high, often the worse we feel.
One of the latest findings in the scientific research is that a happy life does not come from pursuing happiness. It actually comes from pursuing meaning in our lives. Have you ever had the thought that you need to fix yourself and spend time looking after yourself emotionally in order to be happy, whilst at the same time totally withdrawing from life and activities? Whilst we can do this for a day or two, if we do this for a prolonged period it actually makes things so much worse. This is why psychologist recommend for people with depression to get moving and add in activities even though they just want to stay in bed with the covers over their heads.
True happiness is a by-product of living your life according to your values and finding meaning and purpose in day to day activities. The meaning and purpose does not have to be life changing. Many of us have values of family and connection, and spending time with loves one or helping a child with homework can bring great meaning into ones life. It is when we turn away from the world and avoid activities that give us meaning, that we bring much emptiness into our lives. It is important that we ask overselves what we avoid in life and what the costs are of this avoidance. For example, if we feel that we are too fat to go to the beach with our family and swim, and the rest of the family goes without us, are these thoughts and actions costing us connection with our family? Is this cost worth it? Being able to accept that we have certain thoughts, but be able to still continue with actions that are meaningful, is a huge part of resilience, achievement and happiness.
What thoughts and emotions can you accept today in order to increase meaning and purpose into your life?
Want it more than you are afraid of dealing with the negative sensations!
Don’t believe everything you think. Sometimes we can overcome our negative thoughts not by fighting them, but by accepting them and then doing what our heart tells us to do despite the thoughts. This is one of the keys to resilience.